Identity Placement in Writing Therapy

Let’s have a little change of scenery today, if you don’t mind. I mean . . . I like to spice things up a bit on my travels. And, I think a quick trip down memory lane will do the trick. In fact, I like to go back there from time to time, when the mood strikes.

And, a sneak peek backwards in the Degrees of Maternity timeline in order to go forward in our current writing journey is just the perfect backdrop for our look into “identity.” So, let’s proceed, my wonderful traveling companion.

As I was preparing for today’s discussion, I remembered a self-discovery journey I started on in 2018 (my foray into content creator) and the crossroads experience that brought me there.

Now, this crossroads experience had to do with finding my “rightful placement” in my professional life, but I want you to take what I’m saying in these excerpts from a past Degrees of Maternity blog post, and I want you to consider them in light of what we’re talking about in identifying who we’re meant to be in our personal lives.

You’ll see what I mean once we get going.

And let’s just start with my homemade definition of a crossroads experience.

In my mind, being at a crossroads in life equates to arriving at a “fork in the road,” where some critical decision(s) need to be made. You’ve come to that place in your travels, where you’re given multiple roads (in opposing directions) to choose from. And at that junction point, you’re required to pick a road to take in order to continue on in your life travels.

That road you choose will ultimately determine a certain life pathway that will map out what you’ll experience going forward. So, you’ll have to be very careful in choosing the path you believe will get you to the destination you’re seeking.

Now, I want you to read these excerpts, little blasts from the past. And don’t just read them to read them.

I want you to read them in light of what we discussed last week in Uncovering Identity in Personal Writing, as we explore how we’re going to close the gap between where we are currently in our personal makeups and where we want to be in our personal makeups sometime in the near future.

Let’s check out these clips from a blog post (dated April 29, 2020), entitled “Untitled Book #2 – Part 8” to help us start bridging and crossing over that gap.

 . . . a crossroads experience can lead to a displacement or a misplacement, where you have irreconcilable differences between what you’re meant to do versus what you’re actually doing. The struggle is real and it can present itself in any area where your skill sets are not being fully utilized. There’s a gap . . . a void that only a rightful placement can fulfill.

My life’s journey led me to a point in time, where I was ready to close the discrepancy gap between the “where I’m at” and “where I’m meant to be”.

Remember: you’re looking at these excerpts from the lenses of your personal life, not the “professional” side of things. So, position the “rightful placement” in respect to who you are as a person overall.

And then (in this same blog post), I proceeded to explain that I experienced both a “misplacement” and a “displacement” when I stopped homeschooling my son and was faced with that decision at the crossroads junction point that would force me to choose what I would do with my time, talents, skills, abilities — with myself — going forward.

 . . . I identified two placement issues I fell into when I stopped homeschooling my son. I like to refer to one of them as misplacement and the other as displacement.

Definition of misplacement – when you feel like you’re in the wrong place. It’s like a feeling of being in the wrong home. You’re in someone else’s home. Individuals in this state of being have something to do to occupy their time, but they don’t enjoy what they’re doing. They don’t feel fulfilled. They don’t feel like what they’re doing is the best use of their time, talents, or efforts. They feel out of place. They reside somewhere that doesn’t feel like home.

Definition of displacement – when the circumstances around you change and knock you off kilter. Individuals in this state of being are out of sorts. Basically, their homes have moved without them. And, they have nowhere to use their time, talents, or efforts. Their old homes are gone, but they haven’t figured out where their new digs will be just yet. Let’s just say that folks in this state are in limbo (in an unsettled situation), where they don’t have resting places to call home.

I experienced both simultaneously when I stopped homeschooling Little Man.

So, think about it.

Use that “misplacement” and “displacement” ideology and apply it to how you see yourself today in your most personal way.

Do you feel comfortable in the skin you’re in, or do you feel like you need to make some tweaks here and there?

I mean . . . I’m all for self-love. I truly believe you have to have it in order to heal in life. You HAVE to know you’re worthy to experience the best and be the best version you can be. But, let’s face it folks. In order to do better, you have to get better. And that requires you to understand that NO ONE (I mean absolutely NO ONE) is perfect. We have work to do on ourselves each and every day.

And we can’t continuously try to fake ourselves out, making us think that we don’t have any work to do on ourselves. WE HAVE WORK TO DO! Yes, sir. Yes, ma’am.

I don’t know of any human being who doesn’t. And, I don’t even need to survey humanity to make that claim. It’s guaranteed.

Look at it this way. You know. YOU know when you don’t feel quite right about how things are going in your life — what you’re doing — who you’re being. You know the tendencies you carry that aren’t serving you for the better.

And, there’s no sense in shaming yourself about it. No, not at all. That’s not what therapeutic measures — writing or anything else with healing properties — are about.

Therapeutic measures are means to help you come to terms with the areas in life that are holding you hostage, keeping you stagnant, and preventing you from moving on in a better direction in your life.

So, I want you to think about these definitions of “misplacement” and “displacement” when you’re self-inventorying where you’re at in the personal design that makes up YOU right now compared to the personal design of who you desire to be.

What will make you feel “at home” with self? The “rightful placement” where the REAL YOU is meant to reside?

NEXT STEPS: I’m not micromanaging your writing therapy, remember? Therefore, I’m not putting timelines on writing exercises or prompting you on exactly how to go about your writing journey. Just let what naturally comes out come out. Let it flow. Actually, my only request in this whole quest for healing with writing is to please give these activities some time and attention, as you can. I want this journey of self-discovery and healing to be a blessing to you. But it can only work for you based on what you put into it.

Until next time . . .