Writing Therapy Starts With Problem Recognition

Let’s talk about problem recognition, shall we? I mean . . . the very initial stage of working on healing your relationship with yourself is getting to what it is that needs healing. (Hey, probably sounds kind of unnatural to say it like that – “relationship with yourself.” I know. But, what I’m discussing today is very natural, indeed.)

And that’s not to say you don’t have a great relationship with yourself just because you have a problem, or two, or many.

We all have some issues of life to work through. As a human being on this planet, you’ll have some. GUARANTEED!

So, when I refer to your relationship with yourself what I’m really trying to get at is . . . how do you feel about YOU? What do you think of yourself? How do you treat yourself?

Personally, when I don’t feel at my best, I find myself having to go internally with the self-investigation stuff, trying to figure out WHY I’m not feeling the best. Like what is it that’s bugging me about ME?

And, I don’t really have some streamlined process outline for how to do this soul-searching, inner-reflecting I’m referring to.

It looks slightly different every time.

But, one thing that each of those times has in common is the therapeutic link that binds them all — that revealing element of WRITING that’s involved.

And this writing therapy that I naturally administer on myself is nothing short of a miraculous medicinal technique that leads me to being more self-aware. Which is a good thing.

Sometimes, the therapeutic writing comes in the form of brainstorming sessions of list-making about what I’m going to do better. Or, maybe even unleash some strategic SMART goaling activity in my notebook, providing some actionable substance on how I intend to get to the better. Or, I might just need to have a little conversation with myself in my blog here at Degrees of Maternity to help blow out some steam, while revealing some shortcomings I need others to know about and hold me accountable for.

And once my self-awareness uncovers my problems, wouldn’t it make sense to make some kind of decision on what to do with that unpacking of knowledge? Like decide what I’m going to do about those areas of my life that are bugging me about myself?

And, we all have them. At least, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it. And, you’ll never convince me otherwise.

So if we ALL have some concerning self-discoveries we’ve found out about ourselves, it’s best not to bury them in the deep recesses of our minds. Because those reveals will do some damage there if they’re not properly addressed and worked through.

Step #1 of writing therapy is recognizing the problem and acknowledging that the problem is truly A PROBLEM.

And what we’d naturally like to do with problems is solve them, once we take ownership of them. Right?

Now, I know what I said in the last post, entitled About Guided (Prompted) Writing. I said something like . . .

I’m not sure that EVERY problem has a surefire solution in an individual’s life.

And then I also proceeded to state . . .

But I am certain that each individual can use therapeutic means (USE YOUR RESOURCES, FOLKS!) to help ease the discomfort that the problem brings about.

So, we should work toward that end of solving the problem; because if there’s a surefire solution to it, we’d rather take that pill, swallow it, and be done with the problem once and for all. Kind of like that antibiotic you take to clear the infection that plagues you for just a moment in time and then it’s gone — its traces, more than likely, erased for the long-run.

But what we’re not going to do is beat ourselves up if there’s no “once for all” remedy for what’s internally ailing us about ourselves. Sometimes, we can’t definitively shake the unrelenting grip that a problem has in our lives. And that’s the time where we move into problem maintenance, where we might need regular and ongoing treatments to manage the issue. Kind of like treatments people take for chronic ailments.

However, I have to admit that I’m not a fan of the “taking medicine for the rest of your life to mask the effects of the illness without ever curing it” conundrum.

But, we have to be real, folks. There are some issues of life that people grapple with where there’s no man-discovered cure-for-all. (You noticed I said “no man-discovered” cure. Because, I’ll never limit God and what He can do. But, that’s just me and how I feel about the matter. Maybe more in a future blog post about that topic.)

So realistically, some identified problems may not disappear altogether, and therefore, will need some regular maintenance to lessen their negative effects in your life.

Regardless of the cure-for-all or the regular maintenance required, writing therapy provides benefits in both paths of treatment. We just need to get to writing.

First, we start with problem recognition, though. We can’t write about what we haven’t identified yet.

So, I need for you to get to work on your own time, of course. No pressure. But the sooner, the better.

And I want you to sit down somewhere where you can relax and let the mental floodgates open. I want you to list-make regarding those things about yourself that keep nagging at you. You can feel them and you know they’re there and haven’t appropriately been dealt with. They may be very obvious, but they may also take the form of attributes or traits or tendencies or shortcomings that lie deep beneath the surface and aren’t as easily noticeable.

It may take several sessions of this sit-down time with yourself to come up with these areas of concern that need addressing in 2023. Especially, if you’ve been known to bury them in the recesses of the mind, as I mentioned earlier.

So, give yourself some time to unload. But, unload you must. Mind dump those nagging thoughts out onto paper or computer and put them somewhere for safe-keeping. For your eyes only, remember?

You’re dealing with yourself in this exercise. No need to get your business all out there for others to tear apart. Because quite frankly, you haven’t even dealt with it yourself just yet.

Baby steps . . . baby steps, I say.

You must come to terms with your own problematic tendencies in the personal makeup that forms YOU before you can go any other path.

Honesty with self is required here. And the truth hurts, sometimes. But, the truth is also freeing.

So, while I know I’m getting somewhat DEEP, here. Really all I’m asking you to do is write about yourself and what you need to internally work on right now.

This first step of writing therapy is one of the most important. It’s a foundational piece that the rest of the steps are to build upon. Because if you don’t identify what the problem is (problems are), then how can you ever proceed forward with any way to solve/handle it/them?

First things first.

I’ve got my list ready, and I need for you to get yours ready, too.

Next week, we’ll move forward with our lists.