Have you ever noticed how it’s slightly less stressful to teach someone else’s child how to drive rather than your own? It’s almost as if you were born with an extra dose of patience to use in such instances. Sound somewhat relatable? Well, I’m perhaps one of those oddities who was surprisingly in chill mode when taking the passenger’s seat. After all, getting to bask in the glorious rays of I get to be driven around for a change is one of those rarities I could totally get used to. And don’t let me have at least a 90% comfortability level with your driving; because my children will tell you that, in mid-drive, I will fall asleep on you in a hot minute. Needless to say, I’ve learned the art of optimizing the use of these welcomed opportunities to sneak in a quick cat nap or two.
Now, I didn’t have patience on a short leash when it came to giving my children driving lessons; but, at times, I practically choked the life out of it when homeschooling Little Man. Here is where my patience level was tested on a daily basis. And for some reason, I’m guessing that the extra dose of patience would have easily manifested itself if I were teaching someone else’s child given the same set of circumstances I experienced with my own child. Why is that? Could it be that I have higher expectations of my son (because quite frankly he’s my son) and it’s more difficult for me to wait on perfection in my own than in someone else’s? This phenomenon probably sounds terrible, but in all honesty, I think it resonates true for most parents when dealing with their children in the different areas of their lives.
If we don’t have skyrocketed expectations of our children in academics, then it’s in athletics or the arts or something else. But any talent extraordinaire will tell you that perfection takes time. And I tend to hold tightly to the realization that absolutely no man, woman, or child (as mentioned in Earning Degrees) has reached that level of perfection where warm-ups, drills, scrimmages, do-overs, and overall practice is no longer needed. I’ll even go further and state that, as adults, we appreciate it when others extend a measure of patience to us when we need it. So, why would our children deserve anything less? (As I’m sending this message out to others, I’m definitely talking to myself as I need a daily reminder).
Please know that most children want to succeed in the activities they’re involved in. It’s just natural to want to do well or to win at something. So, as long as you see an effort being made, help rather than hinder your child. Sometimes, your impatience or frustration is the greatest deterrent to your child reaching his or her goals and successes. So, I’m striving to take on the following philosophy and it’s deep. Are you ready? Instead of obsessing about practice makes perfect, why not put some of your focus on my patience can lead toward my child’s successes? (Side note: We might have a whole other discussion on how to serve up TOUGH LOVE to children who foolishly and purposely misuse the patience given to them by parents who genuinely try to help them).
Jana’s Quotable:
Do patience unto others as you would like patience done unto you.
degreesofmaternity.com 